What if you bully the wrong person?

One of my patients (a KKM staff) claimed he is bullied at one of the workplace in KKM. He is the only one assisting procedures at the clinic. He is the only one who is designated to open the clinic every morning (why can’t they make a roster of that duty?) He was not able to take any leave at all last year because other seniors wanted to get leave as well.

I asked him: did you talk about it to your boss?
He said, he did.

The issue was brought in the meeting with a general reminder of “we should have good teamwork at the workplace” and it was left at that. But until now, nothing changed

I was skeptical at first. I was astounded that any bosses would allow such blatant disregard of justice at the workplace go unpunished or unaddressed. YM (Doktor Yang Menjaga) Klinik Kesihatan should have addressed the issue. (Tapi kadang2 MA or staff or DSA yg dah senior and baloq liat rasa depa boleh lawan doktor. Kita bagi arahan pun bukan nak dengaq). I feel like I have to do a social investigation by calling the KK myself. To be honest, I intially suspected that it was more exaggeration than truth.

As a PSY MO, I called one of the doctors in-charge of the Klinik Kesihatan to confirm the history. And the next day I called the YM herself. History was confirmed and re-confirmed.

Folks… the patient was telling the truth.

These baloq liat KKM workers just let my patient do all the works that they should have done together. Apparently, there was nothing the doctors can do to change their attitude.

I was pushy. I asked the doctor: How do you mark the SKT of these parasites? Do they get tindakan tatatertib? Does my patient awarded “cemerlang” every year or not? How do you reward or punish your workers?
How is this fair to my patient??

Apparently, doctors sometimes show the trait of learned helplessness when dealing with non-functioning staff and end up over-burdening the only reliable ones. Some of the MAs/staffs/DSAs are older than the doctors themselves and admonishing them become difficult because they simply don’t respect the doctors’ instructions.


I don’t believe in seniority bullshit!!! Any staff/MAs/MOs/specialists no matter how senior they are than me will be given a piece of the same shit they dish out at me! While I do respect specialists and consultants instructions when it comes to the management of my patients, but in other aspects, I should be free to disagree with them especially when it comes to universal ethics and truths. I will at least voice out what I think. That’s the only way to deal with bullies. You confront them and be assertive.

I ended my conversation by saying: Can we call the senior officer in PKD and address the matter? If the YM feels helpless to do anything with the parasites who make my patient’s life difficult, then it’s time we involve the higher authority.

If I have to, I will call the PKD myself. But according to the YM and the doctors in the Klinik Kesihatan, the higher up in the admin already knew about this matter. Still nothing was done!

What is wrong with those in higher up?? What do you do with the power that you have? Bullying is unacceptable! Don’t condone it with silence.

I was never bullied. But when I was a HO in my first posting, I found one of the departments in my hospital really distasteful. I didn’t take ELs nor MCs. Just not my coping style (My pride won’t allow it, anyway. I am the sort of person who the more you try to scare me, the more I am going to act like I don’t give a damn. The irony is such that I am conquered by kindness. Harshness only strengthens my resolve.)
Instead of taking ELs or MCs to deal with my dissatisfaction, I wrote about the bullying that went on in my blog. I was not even anonymous. Again, that’s just not my style.(tak sangka it became viral. But the very reason it became viral was because I wrote the truth! And people identify with that truth. That’s the secret of how post becomes viral. You write on things people can identify with! Simple kan? Kalau tak betul, come and confront me lah!)

Since then…. it made me especially angry at bullies. It is very easy for me to have counter-transference to bullied patients. I like them (extra compared to my other patients) for their endurance and self-sacrifice, while at the same time I bemoan their passivity. I become angry in their behalf and I make extra effort for them. I like to champion the underdogs. Because the favourites and the superiors should be able to take care of themselves, right? You cannot reach your level of superiority without learning a thing or two about defending your rights and your territory. It is an art that we learn as we mature into our age and our profession. It is the underdogs of the society that we should be looking out for.

Mana2 patient yg kena buli, come and see me. If your case is warranted, I will deal with your boss for you.


I can already predict how this will turn out in the end.

Our society is damn passive in dealing with problems involving injustice. Until it happens to us, we just don’t care. This is proven by the inefficiency of the PKD’s management in dealing with the baloq liats of our workplace. Even when the problem has been reported by the YM to the senior officer, nothing changed.

In the end, what will happen is this: The patient will request for medical report from me to support his application to transfer to another Klinik Kesihatan. Another junior staff would be taking his place. And then the new replacement would be bullied as well. The same destructive cycle begins all over again.

I can only pray that the new replacement is someone like me, who would multiply the shit that was given to him and then dump it on the heads of the bullies!

To all bullies out there: One day, you would go overboard. One day you would try to bully someone who is more powerful than you. Or you might come across someone who are not powerful per se, but don’t really have anything to lose if they fight you, anyway. You might think it is safe to bully someone junior. But what if the junior has powerful parents? What if the junior works for his own self-actualization rather than for the salary because he doesn’t really need it? What if he can quit anytime he likes if you make his life difficult, but before quitting he decides to give his all by paying you back and making your life hell before he leaves?

Waktu tu baru kau tahu langit tinggi ke rendah!

P/S: I really don’t have problems with anger management. I manage my anger JUST FINE by scolding the source of my anger. ;P


2 thoughts on “What if you bully the wrong person?

  1. mo kk

    Totally can relate to this. I’m the most junior MO in my KK and I was afraid of the very same thing when I first worked there. However, alhamdulillah the working environment there was very good, I don’t see any injustice yet (hopefully never), the staff rotates shifts and they seem to respect us even though all 3 of us are much, much younger than all of them.
    If not, I think I’ll be one of the MO with learned helplessness if this matter occur in my KK. Housemanship was all about learned helplessness anyway.
    However, I agree with you. Bullying is a vicious cycle. It should be uprooted earlier on.


    1. I am glad that you do not experience any form of bullying at your KK.
      Work is supposed to be enjoyable. We do what we love, that should be enough to sustain satisfaction. But not when the environment around is poisonous

      People say we have to adapt to environment. But should we lower our ethical standard just for the purpose of adapting to an unfair environment?
      I believe, when we are doing the right thing, there is another method of adaptation.
      For example, I adapt by making other people adapt to me (within limit and reason, of course). Hihihi


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