Sincerity has its own smell

It’s the truth that I have a very suspicious nature. I suspect everyone’s intention until they make it clear what they want. And until I have studied that their action supports their declared intention, I will not trust them.

I don’t trust people easily.

And it’s not because I have been hurt in the past or because I have had bad experience ke apa ke.

No.

My life’s been sooo great, it’s fantastic! For which I am always thankful to my Creator and my Maker.

However, we don’t need to have experience in order to have common sense. Seriously.

The best example can be illustrated when we talk about love.  I would label any woman as lacking in common sense if she trusts any man’s words of love until he proves himself WORTHY of her regards. If he says hurtful words towards you, has not asked for your hand in marriage and keep postponing until God knows when….are you going to wait around for him just because he said he loves you? Who knows if he is lying through his rotten teeth?

Those words are CHEAP and MEANINGLESS when it’s not proven by any action. I can say ’I love you’ to a thousand men without meaning any of it! Bukan susah sangat pun! Those words are very cheap and easily uttered. I wouldn’t put too much weight on any of it.

As Muslims we should know better. ‘Iman’ pun perlu dibuktikan dengan perbuatan. Kata-kata saja tidak cukup membuktikan keikhlasan. Semua benda kena dibuktikan dengan perbuatan. Tiba-tiba bila cakap pasal cinta, kamu tidak kisah bila ia tidak dibuktikan dengan perbuatan? Is it ridiculous or is it really ridiculous?

It’s very IMPRACTICAL!! And love should be practical….as been outlined by our religion. Practical love stands the test of time. Romantical love is PURE UNADULTERATED CRAP!!

No one loves us more than our parents do. Their love is practical; proven by action and stands the test of time.

I wish a lot of people would understand this more.

Now! My main point of this post is to state that : When someone comes to us whose words and action seems weird, making you wonder, what does he/she want from me, quickly beware!

That’s what I do. That way, I avoid a lot of people whose personality can be found in DSM-iv criteria. Mentally unstable!

I am not comfortable dealing with someone who has a hidden agenda. And I am the sort of person who can sense that sort of thing and I RUN AWAY from these sorts of people.

If you want something from me, you need only be honest about it and I will help you in anyway I can as long as I don’t feel that you have a hidden agenda.

For example, I hate salespeople. I am sorry to all salespeople in the world. But I really don’t trust you. These people have hidden agendas.

“Kau kisah apa aku puas hati ke tak dengan produk yang aku pakai selama ni? Kau promote produk kau bukan sebab kau betul-betul concern dengan kepuasan hati aku. Kau promote ni supaya aku beli produk kau and kau dapat untung. Kan? Just say it straight, ok?”

Memang lah tugas sales person adalah untuk promote produk dia. Tapi tak payahlah nak berlagak seolah-olah ‘he is doing me a favour’ bila dia dok berceloteh itu ini.

Aku lebih rela dengar salesperson yang cakap “Akak, saya ada nak promote produk baru yang saya harap dapat bersaing dengan produk yang akak dah pakai selama ni. Saya takkan compare produk saya dengan produk yang akak guna selama ni sebab memang sah-sah lah saya akan pro kepada produk saya. Tapi saya hanya nak habaq apa ciri-ciri produk saya dan akak buatlah pertimbangan sendiri samada nak beli atau tidak.”

See? There’s a ring of honesty to it! I can sense it from a mile away. Untuk orang macam ni, aku akan berhenti dan sanggup ambil masa untuk dengar.

Sama juga bila mai bab berdakwah ya!

Saya baru terdengar ceramah Nouman Ali Khan mengenai dakwah. Beliau menyatakan bahawa antara sebab-sebab orang-orang kafir menolak seruan dakwah adalah kerana mereka suspicious akan adanya hidden agenda. Jadi berkali-kali nabi-nabi disuruh untuk menegaskan bahawa mereka tidak mahu bayaran atau apa-apa ganjaran daripada dakwah mereka ini….ganjaran mereka hanya lah diharapkan daripada Allah semata-mata. Mereka bukan minta wang ringgit, pangkat atau wanita…dan nabi-nabi telah buktikan ini dengan perbuatan mereka.

Ini untuk menegaskan lagi bahawa manusia memang akan sentiasa meragui sesuatu jika mereka rasa ada hidden agenda. Jadi Allah bagi method : tegaskan lah kepada manusia-manusia ini that you don’t want anything from this dakwah.

That’s the impression you have to give them. You have to declare to them and make sure they believe that you have NO CONFLICT OF INTERESTS.

Bagaimana kredibiliti Nabi Muhammad (S.A.W) jika baginda berdakwah sambil hidup mewah? Pernah terfikir kah mengapa ketua pertama Negara Islam seperti  junjungan besar kita menolak hidup dalam kemewahan?

It’s about credibility. Kita hendaklah ‘meraikan’ psychology manusia yang normal….yang sentiasa tertanya-tanya ‘what do you want from me when you approach me?’

Sayang nya….zaman skarang ni mungkin ada manusia yang psychology dia dah tak betul. Senang sekali tertipu. Tertipu dengan boyfriend, tertipu dengan jualan langsung multi-level-marketing, tertipu itu dan ini. Mungkin mereka terlalu biasa mengabaikan ‘instinct’ sendiri (terutama bila berkaitan dengan bf) sampai Allah tarik kembali ‘instinct’ kita untuk membezakan mana yang benar dan mana yang salah.

Kalau mak saya cakap ‘makan ubat ni, mesti kak ngah sembuh’….saya akan percaya walaupun mak saya tak ada medical degree. Tapi kalau ada drug company mai cakap kat saya, ‘ambil ubat ni, ia mempunyai bahan so-and-so, dilengkapi dengan supplement this-and –that dan dihasilkan oleh orang yang berpengalaman dalam pharmacology’, my first instinct would be to question his statement.

Kenapa?

Sebab manusia yang normal (even yang tidak berpendidikan tinggi pun) patut ada instinct untuk membezakan bahawa mak kita tidak ada ‘conflict of interest’.  Unlike in the case of the drug company.

Jika drug company itu bercakap benar sekali pun….tapi kita perlukan bukti baru kita percaya kan? Sebab drug company itu ada ‘interest’ lain (which is nak jual produk dia) dan mak kita punya interest hanya untuk melihat kita sihat dan bahagia. Kalau mak kita tersilap pun, kita takkan kisah. Tapi kalau drug company yang tersilap (walaupun tak sengaja), sampai ke court aku kejar.

(Don’t play-play with Afiza. I am nice and well-mannered…until I am not and you’ll be shocked!)

Ini tidak bermakna kita nak label semua peniaga ini penipu. No! Tapi orang-orang yang berniaga hendaklah tahu bahawa ini adalah psychology manusia normal dengan IQ average. Kalau perniaga ada pengetahuan ini, barulah dia boleh menambat hati orang lain.

Orang yang berniaga hendaklah tahu bahawa semua orang tak suka hidden agenda. Jadi kita hendaklah declare ‘conflict of interest.’

Contoh declare conflict of interest adalah: “Buah-buah ni saya dah kelaskan ikut kualiti.Yang sebelah sini memang saya jual murah, sebab ada cacat sikitlah. Tapi cacat pun ada bahagian yang boleh makan. Dan saya pun dah jual murah. Jadi kalau akak nak ambil buah yang cacat sikit ni, kita sama-sama untung juga. BUah yang sebelah sini pula, saya jual mahal sebab ia lebih berkualiti. Either way pun, kita sama-sama untung. Akak buat lah decision sendiri, akak nak yang mana satu. Up to you, saya tak paksa.”

Masha Allah! Kalau aku jumpa peniaga macam ni, aku takkan jenguk pun gerai lain lagi dah! You can SENSE their honesty! Kita boleh RASA benda macam ni…x perlu berlajar tinggi-tinggi pun tak pa.

Sincerity has its own smell.

Bukankah itu salah satu cara Islam berkembang ke Nusantara? Orang-orang Melayu kagum dengan sikap pedagang Arab yang jujur and ‘declare’ barang dagangan mereka yang mana yang kurang berkualiti dan yang mana satu yang lebih baik. Pedagang-pedagang Arab membenarkan pembeli membuat ‘informed decision.’

Again, sincerity has its own smell. Tapi jika kamu sudah terbiasa mengabaikan ‘instinct’ sendiri dan tidak mahu mengikut kaedah yang Allah dah ajar untuk ‘menilai dengan perbuatan’ dalam membuat keputusan, makin lama instinct kamu akan tumpul. Tidak hairanlah jika orang boleh tipu kamu hidup-hidup!

Now, berbalik kepada berdakwah.

Aku mahu orang berdakwah dengan ikhlas tanpa agenda! Kalau ada agenda, declare lah!

Contoh! Jika PAS kata kita hendak berdakwah dengan orang kafir, dakwahlah kepada BOTH parti DAP dan parti MCA. Itu maknanya ‘declare your intention and let others judge your actions’.

Mungkin PAS ikhlas. Tapi again….kita kena raikan sikap psychology manusia yang Allah sudah ajar para nabi-Nya.

Macam mana aku nak percaya PAS ikhlas berdakwah bila kita tahu dia parti politik? Mungkin dia ikhlas! Tapi aku sebagai manusia yang mempunyai psychology yang normal, akan sentiasa ‘question their sincerity’.

Adakah aku salah?

Jadi, aku memang lebih cenderung untuk mendengar pendapat ulama yang tidak berada dalam parti. Seperti Dr. MAZA. Bagi aku, ini kerana aku mempunyai psychology yang normal yang mahu mengelak daripada dipergunakan dan ditipu.

Memang politik ada dalam agama. Tapi bukan seperti yang kita lihat sekarang. Agama menyentuh bab politik dari segi cara pentadbiran. Tapi yang ada sekarang adalah politik bangang! I don’t trust anyone yang berparti.

Because I hate conflict of interest, other than the interest for truth and justice. Memang susah nak buat pernilaian…tapi kajilah dengan melihat perbuatan.

Jangan biarkan ‘instinct’ kita tumpul. Bukan saja dari segi politik, malah dari segi business mahupun relationship.

Always question people’s motives when they approach you for any reason….unless they have declared their intention and followed it up with concrete actions!

Use the method that Allah has taught us and implement it in our daily lives. And then you will remember that sincerity has its own smell.

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Housemanship Induction

Kursus Induksi Pegawai Perubatan Siswazah UD41, Bilangan 2, Tahun 2011 di Hotel Putra, Jalan Tun Abdul Razak.

18 Jan – 21 Jan

(The writer is writing on the way back to Alor Star from Hentian Duta. The writer is most humbly PROUD to announce that she is going home by bus, at the moment. ALONE.)

 

The hardest thing about kursus induksi is the prejudice dread that one may feel in attending it. I was concerned – of course – about the less-than-acceptable accommodation facilities(remember BTN Ulu Tiram, anyone?) and the boring elements of the schoolroom material that we will be forced to listen to.

 

I never failed to fall asleep in some – if not all – of the talks given in the previous times that I had attended any form of induction.

 

But not this time, folks.

 

This time I did not fall asleep (that is not to say that my mind did not wander away every now and then. And of course, there were times when I tuned out a bit. But I did NOT fall asleep.)

 

The reason for my admirable self control had nothing to do with the exciting talks or materials presented to us, fresh graduates. It had everything to do with the fact that the moment I registered myself into induction was the very beginning of my being paid as a government servant.

 

I am now, a PAID Doctor. And I have the responsibility to make sure – to the best of my abilities – that my salary is halal. That I have earned it by doing what was expected of me. And at that moment my job was to listen to the lectures in induction, so I had no choice but to execute that order in the best way I knew how, right?

 

Let me tell you, dear readers, the burden of being a government servant is not lost on me. No more sleeping during lectures without feeling guilty. No more ‘ponteng-ponteng’ and then simply brush it off as being childish and naughty.

 

I am expected to act as adult. And my Gemini tendency of being carefree and forever-young is forced to catch up.

 

And catch-up fast and furious too! I can’t procrastinate no more.

 

Because I have been asked to report for duty this coming Sunday, on the 23rd of January 2011 to the Director of JKN, Kedah. Yes, that soon. Like, tomorrow soon.

 

I am also happy to say that the induction program that you attend as adult (ehem ehem) is vastly different from the one you attended during your school years. No more the horror of Ulu Tiram (toilet yang ‘canggih’ itu, Ya Rabbi); it’s Hotel Putra in Jalan Tun Abdul Razak this time, situated opposite to the IJN and next to the Hospital Pusrawi. So, the accommodation was really good and I have nothing bad to say about it. Furthermore,Riadah is not even sweat-breaking (in fact, we interpreted on our own what we meant by riadah and most of the time, it was spent in the group discussion for the drama that we had to perform on the last day). We were also provided with excellent food of 6 times a day(chubby cheek and round tummy will remarkably improve during the hours of housemanship, I hope) Last but certainly not least, there was also the very charming company of dedicated doctors who share your hope and your fears. A real sense of camaraderie, I tell you.

 

All in all, induction was not bad at all. In fact, it was as good as any induction can be reasonably expected to be.

****

 

The thing about being a doctor in Malaysia is the sense of belonging that I have lonnngggg fantasized to feel when I was down under. In Australia, you can feel alone and alienated even when you are surrounded by scores of Australian friends. They are only going to be as friendly as strangers

 

You can’t be friendly-friendly with someone whom you don’t share common ground with. You can only be stranger-friendly and make exhausting small talk with someone who goes to party (and you don’t), who find lewd things funny (and you don’t but you have to crack a smile anyway), who thinks (even subconsciously) that they are superior than you (of course not!! We mastered two languages and we are learning medicine in our second language, okay!), who already has his/her own set of friends with whom they share the same interest and pastimes (which you were never part of, through nobody’s fault).

 

I attended this induction not knowing anyone at all. None.And I am glad to say that making friends was so effortless. A walk in the park, a picnic by the beach and a piece of cake, all roll into one, making for an enjoyable time.

 

I walked into the lecture room and the dining hall with the unshakeable confidence that I belonged. I walked into the room convinced that I can talk with anyone without feeling like I have to make some rubbish small talk of a topic I have not a jot of care about.

 

This, dear readers. This! is the feeling I have longed for in all those years that I have been away. It matters little what people say about our health care system (which has a lot to be desired, I admit). It matters little when you compare it to the sense of belonging and the confidence that culturally, you do have the instinctive knowledge of exactly what to say to your patients anywhere anytime,.

 

And the remarkably easy bonding that you can form with someone you have only met for 3 days is amazing! Come home, and you will experience it.

 

But of course, it wouldn’t do for me to encourage future doctors to walk around in rose-tinted glasses when it comes to working in Malaysia. You know it’s gonna be hard. You understand it’s gonna be tough, But when things go wrong, you know you belong and the right people will help and support you.

 

My Placement

I was concerned at first that no one else in my induction batch got Hospital Sultanah Bahiyah (HSB) other than me. I mean, maaan…. I was hoping that I would be able to make friends with someone whom I can share the grief of working as house officer with. I walked around asking anyone whether they knew anyone who was posted in HSB. No one said they knew anyone with the same posting as me. But finally, on the very last day (well, on the very last hour actually) of the induction program, I met two more doctors who are posted at the same place as I; Dr. S and Dr. K. Thank God. We exchanged phone numbers and I look forward to meeting them at the Director’s office this coming Sunday.

 

In preparation for my housemanship, I have collected a few words of motivation to see me through the guaranteed hardships. And I would like to share them with you, my dear readers. Who knows how long will it get until I am able to write another post, right? So,I might as well leave you something beneficial in the mean time. Something that we can improve on and practice in our daily lives.

 

So here goes. Something for anger management and patience. :))

    The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “The best of you are those who are slow to anger and swift to cool down…Beware of anger, for it is a live coal on the heart of the descendants of Adam.”– Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 1331

     

    “(The righteous) are those who spend generously (in the way of God), whether they are in prosperity or in adversity, who control their anger and forgive other people, for God loves those who do good.”– The Holy Quran, 3:134

     

    A man said to the Prophet (pbuh), “Advise me!” The Prophet said, “Do not become angry and furious.” The man asked (the same) again and again, and the Prophet said in each case, “Do not become angry and furious.” Hadith – Sahih Al-Bukhari 8.137

     

    It is said that he (sallallahu aleihi wa sallam) mentioned anger, saying, “Some are swift to anger and swift to cool down, the one characteristic making up for the other; some are slow to anger and slow to cool down, the one characteristic making up for the other; but the best of you are those who are slow to anger and swift to cool down, and the worst of you are those who are swift to anger and slow to cool down.” He continued, “Beware of anger, for it is a live coal on the heart of the descendant of Adam. Do you not notice the swelling of the veins of his neck and the redness of his eyes? So when anyone experiences anything of that nature he should lie down and cleave to the earth.”

     

    Abdullâh ibn Mubârak (rahimahullâh) would say, “The world is the believer’s prison. The best action in the prison is patience and control of one’s anger. The believer has no country in the world, His land will be there tomorrow in the Afterlife.”

     

    “And verily, whosoever shows patience and forgives, that would truly be from the things recommended by Allah.” (42:43)

     

    “Seek help in patience and As-Salat (the prayer). Truly, Allah is with As-Sabirun (the patient).” (2:153)

     

     

    The take home message is: When yelled at and scolded by your MO or any other of your superiors, privately or otherwise…. just have patience. Don’t be furious. Don’t be angry. Just apologize and move on. And pray that your superiors will someday learn and internalize the virtues in the quotes above.

     

    Until the next post, folks. Pray for me.

    Salam and take care.

    SPA, MMC, KKM: The Procedure of Launching Oneself Into Housemanship.

    When I first got back from Australia, I had no idea what to do. I was at a lost as to the procedures required to get myself registered and launched into the (glorious and tears-free….NOT) world of housemanship.

    Until I stumbled across one particular blog which had provided me a rough but adequate idea of where to go and what to do before your existence is recognized by the powers that be. I remember thinking “What a beneficial post this is to oversea-grad med students like me.”

    So here, I humbly offer my updated version of that post. May it be beneficial, insya Allah.

     

    Basic Knowledge of the Procedure:

    1. You have three places to register to:
        a)MMC (Malaysian Medical Council) 

        b)KKM

        c)SPA

    2. Those places are not related to one another. So, you can choose to go which ever one first. But I highly suggest that you go to MMC first because they will give you one particular letter (Surat Pengesahan Penerimaan Permohonan Sijil Perakuan Sementara) that you can submit to KKM and SPA. (KKM and SPA will ask you for that letter. But not having it will not affect your application. But it’s better for you to have it, regardless. Hence, my suggestion for you to go to MMC first)
    3. And for each of those places, you have to submit certain documents that should be verified by the appropriate authorities. (Pesuruhjaya Sumpah, Justice of The peace etc etc).
    4. MMC and KKM do not require any appointments. Just walk in and submit forms. But for SPA, you need to ask for the date of the interview.

     

    Bear in mind that you can make preparation for all those three places simultaneously and then just go to Putrajaya and settle everything in 1-2 days. But the details below will be described according to the requirement of the specific organization.

     

    SPA:

    -Go to SPA official website and search for the SPA81 online form and fill them up.

    -Wait for three working days, and then call SPA (the phone number can be found in SPA website). Tell the operator that you are the very competent and enthusiastic fresh graduate of med school who would like to arrange for an interview so that you may start working.

    -The operator will connect you to the person in charge.

    -The person in charge will ask you whether you have completed the online form SPA81. Say, yes.

    -She will say that she will call you for an interview as soon as it’s been arranged. (and they WILL call you; give them your phone number and handset number. They are quite efficient. They call when they say they will; so don’t worry)

    -In the meantime, you may prepare for the interview by preparing these documents:

    -verified copy of your IC

    -verified copy of your birth letter

    -verified copy of your SPM certificate

    -verified copy of your IB/A level/matrix

    -verified copy of your degree  (if you don’t have a degree, then you MUST have a verified copy of your full transcript + a verified copy of the confirmation letter signed by your dean, basically saying that you have fulfilled all your study requirements. You need BOTH documents present if you don’t yet have a degree. If your degree is in a different language other than Malay and English, then you MUST get them translated.)

     

    -When they call you for an interview, take note of the date (go one day earlier if you wish to go to MMC and KKM first before going to SPA. Because all morning candidates have to arrive at the SPA at 8.00 a.m. But if you are the afternoon candidates, then there will be more than enough time for you to go to MMC and KKM in the morning of the interview before swinging to SPA; in this case there’s no need to arrive one day earlier. However, if you don’t mind not having the letter by MMC for submission to SPA, which is not compulsory, then you can go at your own discretion.)

    -Remember to bring the original documents too.

    -Interview preparation: Just take note of the vision and mission of KKM (visit KKM website). Take note of the hot shot persons in KKM (the minister, the deputy, the director). Know a little bit of the six NKRA (national key results areas). Know all the ministers of the important ministries. In terms of diseases: I only prepared the tropical ones. They asked you about your (lack of) experience mostly. So no need to panic.

     

    MMC:

    -You have to down load a particular form (Borang 4) and fill them up.

    -The form can be accessed here:

    http://mmc.gov.my/v1/docs/form/1.Sementara%20-%20kemaskini.pdf

    -Prepare the same verified copies of the documents that you have to prepare for SPA.

    -TAKE NOTE of how exactly these documents need to be verified for MMC. MMC is VERY fussy about this. The verifier should include his name, his post, his address. All his signature must be in full, and not merely an initial. And his signatures must be the same for all documents (please read these instructions on your own. It’s all there in the form that you download)

    -Prepare a postal money order (wang pos) of Rm20 and address it to Pendaftar Pengamal Perubatan. This is some sort of fees for processing your documents.

    -Go to MMC, submit all the Borang 4 + the verified documents + the postal money order.

    -You will be asked to wait for a few minutes. (they work quite efficiently there. I only waited for 5 mins)

    -Later, the person in charge will emerge and give you the original ‘Surat Pengesahan Penerimaan Permohonan Sijil Perakuan Sementara’ plus two copis of it.

    -you keep the original to show at induction; otherwise you won’t be                         allowed into induction.

    -one copy is to be given to KKM.

    -one copy is to be given to the director of the hospital you will be        working in. (the SPA person also asked me for a copy of this letter, which I had given. Therefore, I will have to make another copy for my hospital director. See? That’s why I suggest that you go to MMC first, even though these letters are not STRICTLY compulsory, but you’ll be asked for it. It’s good to be able to give it to them, regardless).

     

    KKM:

    -You have to download a BMD form (Borang Maklumat Diri), fill them up.

    -The form can be accessed here:

    http://www.mediafire.com/?jqggmomhy2lifwo

    -Prepare the same verified documents as you have done with MMC and SPA. (plus the letter from MMC)

    -The building of KKM is just across the road from the building of MMC.

    -So walk out of MMC, go to KKM and submit all the documents. That’s it. You will be told that they will call you for induction soon.

     

    For MARA and JPA scholars (or other scholars), you may want to ask your respective organization as to any particular procedure or steps that need to fulfilled. I haven’t contacted MARA yet, myself. I am just waiting for them to contact me. Hahahh.

     

    What I did:

    -I received the interview date and the time (4th of Jan, 8 a.m)

    -I went to Putrajaya one day earlier. On that day, I went to MMC and submit the forms and documents. And then I went to KKM and submit all the forms and documents + the letter that I obtained from MMC.

    -Chill and shop for the rest of the day.

    -Went for the interview at SPA the next day.

    Hope all these very long instructions help those who may be lost out there. Cheers and Salam.