Mode: Indecisive

I am a Gemini…the dual signs. The twins. The Yin and Yang.

Before anyone started to condemn my kurafat-ness with regards to astrology, let me calm everyone’s suspicion by affirming and reaffirming that I have ZERO belief in such things. However, it was PURE coincidence that I do have one prominent gemini trait…the ability to see BOTH sides of anything or at least the genuine concern of getting two opposite views. While some people may think that it is a good trait, I generally think that it hinders decision making.

I used to play devil advocate too and delight in doing it. There are times when someone’s opinion might be in perfect alignment with my own but I would throw another light into the matter just to see how the discussion would go. Just for the hell of it. Provocative, MUCH? I am terrible, I know. Maybe I am that way because to me, agreeing is boring. God! I really should lose this annoying trait.

I am in the middle of a big decision and I just could not decide. Susahhhnyaaa! Aku baru buat istikharah…baru sekali. And I really don’t know whether I had felt any different the next day. I was not sure what I feel. It’s just like deciding whether or not to live on campus or off-campus. Hinggalah aku dipaksa keluar baru laaa aku keluar. That’s how I am; I am comfortable in my own skin and I am comfortable in every current situation I am in. It’s familiar and it’s comfortable and it’s happy. Begitulah aku, selagi keadaan tidak ‘memaksa’, aku akan rasa selesa dengan ‘status quo’. Jangan diubah, or else the autistic in me akan melatah.

To stay in this pasture? Or venture out to another? That’s the question!

Since then, I’ve been collecting quotes about decision making in the internet. Maybe writing them up would strengthen my will to choose what’s best.

  • Choose always the way that seems the best, however rough it may be. Custom will soon render it easy and agreeable. -Pythagoras.

                      Hmmm…makes me want to venture out when you put it that way, Pythagoras. You’ve settled it for me. Thanks a bunch!

  • Each indecision brings its own delays and days are lost lamenting over lost days… What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has magic, power, and genius in it. -Johann Wolfgang van Goethe.

                     Oh, you are spot on, Goethe! You can have no idea how much of my time have lost pondering over this! Okay, time to be BOLD!!

  • Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there. – Will Rogers

                   Wiity, quote! I like it and able to appreciate it. Blergh (that’s the sounds of my crushed internal organs as I got run over; the crushed organs being mostly my brain and my heart)

  • Four steps to achievement: Plan purposefully. Prepare prayerfully. Proceed positively. Pursue persistently. -William A. Ward.

                  Maybe it’s time to increase the prayer.

  • Take your life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. -Erica Jong

                 I can have only myself to blame for anything! A scary thought, that!

  • The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one. -Elbert Hubbard

                   Ugh, you have no idea how good it sounds but how hard to it is to implement! But very bright, Hubbard!

  • There is no more miserable human being than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision.  – William James.

                Ouch!! (though it’s not exactly habitual with me.)

  • Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision.

                I took a deep breath and pray for courage.

  • By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. -Confucius.

                 I like to reflect. And I leave it at that.

I am still indecisive. But from now on, I would at least stop talking about it. I will take  Goethe advice (since I like his quote the most).   At least, I can stop the wasted time deliberating over it. I have been in these situation countless times, and though I was always indecisve, I did make good decisions when the time is absolutely vital!

6 thoughts on “Mode: Indecisive

  1. kak fiza, are u still thinking about whether to go back or not eh?

    haha. if it that case, i know its hard decision kan. maybe not for me, sebab lambat lagi tayaahh ngade2 nak pikir an.

    keep on istikharah! 🙂 go go go!
    cop! kalau ade orang masuk meminang, surely u have to go back!!!

    p/s: ye2 je pasal ni kan.


  2. afizaazmee

    Kalau ada orang masuk meminang? ROFL! Belum tentu akak balik.

    But highly unlikely at this stage nak kawen. I am still selfish and I want to put myself first before others; I am so terrible kan? ahaks!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s